This is the first question on the Weight and Lifestyle Inventory I had to fill out prior to my psychiatric evaluation for weight loss surgery.
I really had to think about this question hard. I can’t remember a time when I DID NOT feel overweight. However, I know there is a picture of me and my Dad from when I was five. I was in a parade in a baton group. We always had to wear a red sequin leotard that looked like a swimsuit. I HATED it. I remember wondering why my best friend’s thighs weren’t chubby like mine. I don’t know where I learned this behavior or this view. I never remember anyone specifically telling me that I was different from the the other girls but I distinctly remember feeling different. I think this is why I had such a hard time accepting myself the first time I lost weight. I don’t know what normal feels like.
Another step on the journey..
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I am right there with you… minus the leotard. My first memory of it was in 1st grade when I liked a girl. I remember when she ended up liking another guy instead of me, I thought it was because of my weight. Funny how this has repeated itself for the next 22 years.